unexpected guest this easter ……

Well I say guest but he lives here lol.I was supposed to have my monthly break this week with both kids packing their bags and visiting their dad. However that didn’t happen because for some reason their dad my ex likes to be awkward and play games .You name it he does it and I have no idea why only to annoy me and make my life difficult. If truth be told he has made my life difficult since I was 17 and when he starts I get emotionally and physically drained  often leaving me feeling utter useless and fed up .I get cross at the fact he still has soo much effect on me but when it involved my children its hard not to get annoyed .

So in true Charlene fashion my body is starting to get run down with possible water infection and a sty and general tiredness. The break I get when they are at ther dads I use to rest and sleep and be Charlene s with lynx being here I cant do that .

Of course I adore him being here and tbh I think he’s happier here because he feels safe loved and secure and I also am probably the only person who gets him because of his autism .However id be lying if i didn’t say realising I wasn’t having a break made me feel fed up and question a lot ??  and then of course in true mum fashion feeling guilt about having those thoughts and feelings .I had to cancel several plans which left me feeling frustrated .

We are enjoying our quality mummy and son time and its very chilled .We have laid in because unlike his sister lynx lays in! lol  we went swimming ,have watched dvds ,baked ,read stories ,been to the park and today went to see THE AMAZING SPIDERMAN 2 !! its amazing. We have a few other plans lined up though lynx would often rather stay in all day I know the benefit on both of us to get out . Tomorrow we are seeing my sister and her mum (complicated ) and im looking forward to that adult interaction !!!

I will leave it at that despite having lots to say mainly coz right now I need a bath and read 🙂

Hope you are having great Easter holidays 🙂

 

 

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