the cloud in my head and heart (DEPRESSION)

Well its back and I don’t know if its that alone that’s affecting me or its life’s situations that are amplifying my illness.

I have battled for years with depression and anxiety and I feel I have learnt to manage it well knowing what triggers it and what helps it .

However in winter with grey skies cold weather it is hard !!I was ill for long time physically so gt out of shape and routine with my exercise which I know really helps me to have focus and release endorphins. And with anything  its hard to get back into routine .I have been slowly but several other factors are making me feel low and isolated .

I was receiving cbt through mind but they have discharged me !! nightmare and ive had to self refer mysef back .Having theray as sad as it sounds gives me somewhere to go and have someone to listen to ME!!! its also interaction with another adult.This is becoming a rarity this days often going days with having no conversations except with my children which is often just me nagging them !!

Being a single parent is rewarding bla bla but bloody hell its isolating ,lonely and hard . No one to ask how u r an how ur day has been ??

Im currently not working or studying which is the first time for long time and this is taking its toll on my confidence and self esteem and also having a purpose .

Their dad is basically a part time dad yet does no wrong and its very frstating and im exhausted but aware depression is making this worse.

My son is autistic and can b very full on and my daughter is 12 with a attitude .And some days when ive nagged for the 10th time that week about the same thing quite frankly I want to jus curl u in bed and cry .

This is where twitter comes in and I will apologise now for some days my tweets are too negative but bear in mind its often my only link to anyone and it helps .  

I know my mood will lift and I know what I need to do but somedays its just soo hard .